Transformational questions liberate us. Mental pain comes from resistence. Transformational questions are usually the last things we think to ask ourselves. I mean really think about it. The only problem that exists when a lover decides to leave us is our resistance to the change. We could simply say, “Okay,” and get on with our lives. Equally, should we find ourselves requiring more money? We might roll up our sleeves and get creative. These are the actions of acceptance. So why do we choose to resist and experience pain?
Some might say it’s due to pride or ego, though I think it’s simpler than that.
I’ve heard it said, that the only certainties in life are death and taxes. Though tax laws change all the time. So I guess death is the only certainty in life. Yet so many people fear change like it was death. You don’t have to be a Mensan to deduce that in order to prosper, we have no choice but to learn to embrace change or at our peril, become redundant. So the first step to embrace change is to start asking ourselves some transformational questions.
Transformational questions are asked by the person with the most flexibility
After I learned how to become a life coach, I went on to study and master Neuro Linguistic Programming – I now teach it! It was then that I came upon a transformational law (in NLP it’s called ‘The Presuppositions’) that not only opened my thinking, it immediately had me accepting the idea of embracing change. The transformational law was called, ‘The Law of Requisite Variety.’ Translated, it means: “The person or the system with the most flexibility controls the system.” I realised the value of flexibility and made a new decision. I abandoned one of my arrogant rules: “It’s my way or the highway.” It was a stupid credo anyway. I mean who says that these days?
So if the world is changing moment by moment, so should we. I mean after all, if we are going to find the path to success wouldn’t it be beneficial to try a new path until we find the path to success? So I did.
A transformational question is likely to create a transformation. I recall Tony Robbins saying, “The quality of our lives are determined by the quality of our questions that we ask ourselves every day.” So I felt that it would be best to start there. So I asked myself a question that I had yet not asked myself.
“What if everything I believe about how the world works is wrong.”
I was totally right about that! The magic that transpired was…purely magical I guess. How magical? Let me share.
At that time in my life, I was $70,000 in debt and down to the last $100 in my bank account. I had no strategy other than continuing to do what I was doing. So I wasn’t exactly in the most admirable space. So I did something different and it turned me into a millionaire.
I thought to myself; perhaps our entire existence and everything I once thought about life and how the world works is an illusion. It turns out I was finally right. “What if how I think the world of money works, is totally wrong?” This was my most powerful transformational question to-date!
I started pretending that I was in a movie. I was a bored, multi-millionaire working in a job because I was couldn’t stand doing nothing, anymore. I wanted to help someone, anyone! I wanted to find my purpose. I really tried it on. So how did I do that? That might just be a transformation question. Thank you for asking.
I was working in sales for an American company, out of an office in the Rialto building in Melbourne, Australia. My teeny, tiny office was on the 46th floor facing north. My greatest achievement at the time was that I was worst sales person in the history of the company. Not the most brilliant of achievements. By my estimation, I gave myself another 3 months before I would be given notice. So as my new multi-millionaire character, all this history just vanished. I made up a whole new story in my head. It actually felt good to let go of the pressure. Now this is where it gets magical.
Multi-millionaires are usually pretty comfortable financially, right? So I decided to feel what that actually felt like. I asked myself another transformational question, “What would a multi-millionaire feel like? I just pretended I could feel it and walked up to the window of my office, and looked out over Melbourne. I imagined what my office smelled like… (sniff) leather, honey-wax polished furniture and a fragrant smell of lavender filled my senses. I imagined what it looked like… it was beautifully minimalist, leather furniture, gorgeous walnut desk and sideboard with a small water feature in one corner quietly, peacefully trickling away. I really felt rich. Really rich! It was then that my phone rang and in that one phone call, I made half a year’s salary! Can you believe that! In one moment. In one phone call, my financial world transformed! Something shifted in that moment.
So let me get to the most important point.
In the next 2 weeks, I made two years’ salary and in the next three months I went from the worst salesperson in the history of the company to become the best and most highly paid salesperson the company had ever employed! All this happened just by me changing my mindset.
I got so good at it that people from all over the world wanted me to teach it to them. I wrote a book about it. I started running weekend workshops and my most successful course to date is our Rich Mind – Change your blueprint in 90-days program. Today, that’s what I do and I love doing it. So much so, that I will never retire. I think retirement is an old, outdated idea. I much prefer rewirement. So what would your perfect life look like? That could be one of your most transformational questions ever?
Rik Schnabel is Australia’s #1 Brain Untrainer and an accredited trainer of Neuro Linguistic Programming, Life Coaching, Speaker Training and Trainers Training with his company Life Beyond Limits.